Never Say Genius

Today is Coke and Pepsi McDonald's thirteenth birthday. Someone's out to make sure they never make it to thirteen and a half. Racing across America,the twins will nearly beBOILED ALIVEin a huge basket of french fries,FROZEN TO DEATHby soft-serve ice cream,STAMPEDEDin a wild stadium riot,KIDNAPPEDfrom a high-speedroller coaster, andWORST OF ALLtheir parents thinkthey're totally joking!Will they survive? Will they defeat Archie Clone? Will they be dropped out of a helicopter onto the tip of the Washington Monument? Will they ever say "genius"?